


Quit Playing Games

by 1hana1flower



Category: Smosh
Genre: Action, Angst and Humor, Awkward Tension, Comedy RPF, Crack, Fantasy, Friendship, Guns, Screenplay/Script Format, Superpowers, Swearing, Thriller
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:35:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23453350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1hana1flower/pseuds/1hana1flower
Summary: It was supposed to be a table reading. Nothing else.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s), platonic - Relationship
Kudos: 10





	Quit Playing Games

**INT. DAMIEN’S APARTEMENT - DAY**

DAMIEN finds himself watching time go by, on his apartment floor. The clock on the wall seems more interesting than anything Damien was supposed to today. Damien never told his friends about his situation, about his ability. He refuses to do so. It would be easier to keep it to himself. He sighs and stands up.

DAMIEN

I’m fine, I’m just going to go about my day and pretend…just like yesterday…

**INT. OFFICE’S LOBBY - DAY**

Damien enters the office’s lobby. It’s a normal day at work. AMANDA greets him with a sign of the head. Maybe he’ll hear something stupid and laugh about it for 10 minutes to fill the void in his heart. Maybe he’ll have to run for his life to make him feel like his life has value. COURTNEY enters.

COURTNEY

Hey, dude.

DAMIEN

What’s up?

COURTNEY

Table reading in 5.

Damien frowns. He looks at COURTNEY. He’s confused.

DAMIEN

I have not been informed about this.

Courtney chuckles.

COURTNEY

Surprise!

As Courtney leaves, Damien watches her still confused. He is left in deep thought as time ticks down. Doubt surfaces within Damien.

DAMIEN

How come nobody told me about this?

**INT. MEETING ROOM - DAY**

Some time pass by before Damien walks into the meeting room. Everyone is there, looking up at him as if they knew he would be unusually late. IAN takes off his glasses, massages his nose bridge with his eyes closed. He seems disappointed. 

IAN

Just sit down Damien.

Damien, silently, sits down between SHAYNE and OLIVIA. He takes the script in his hand and looks around to meet Shayne’s eyes. Damien tries to communicate with him. Shayne offers him a tight smile and a shoulder shrug. Ian clears his throat before speaking again.

IAN (CONT'D)

So, let’s start from the beginning.

The crew starts reading. Damien zones out for a while until Shayne screams his line next to him.

SHAYNE

OH MY GOD! ASS CRAMP!

Damien can’t help but laugh. Ian, however, gets impatient.

IAN

Damien, line.

DAMIEN

(between laughter)

Right, right. Sorry.

Benefits of a good work out…search…

Damien pretends to type on a laptop. Ian frowns.

DAMIEN (CONT'D)

How about, benefits of eating…search…

(enthusiastically)

That’s right! I’m not dying anytime soon!

Damien looks around and sees that everyone is staring at him. He starts to get worried and opens his mouth to voice his concerns however, Shayne beats him to it.

SHAYNE

What was that!?

DAMIEN

(confused)

What do you mean?

OLIVIA

(baffled)

You didn’t even look at the script!

DAMIEN

Uh, yeah I did. Look!

Damien looks down at the script. There’s nothing special on it. He didn’t miss a line. He was fine.

KEITH

Oh hell nah. I’m done. I’m so done with this witchcraft bullshit!

Damien looks around the table. KEITH seems distressed, NOAH looks confused, as well as Shayne. Olivia doesn’t even look at him. Courtney is looking at Ian with pleading eyes. Ian looks like every emotion possible hit him with a machete.

IAN

(annoyed)

Look man, this is a table reading. It is our first time reading the script. How on Earth do you know your lines without reading it in the first place?

Damien purses his lips and sighs.

DAMIEN

I’m never going to live this down, am I?

IAN

(angry)

Quit playing games, Damien!

Damien can see that Ian is angry.

DAMIEN

I just don’t get why you’re all making this a bigger deal than it actually is!

IAN

I won’t say it again, Haas. How do you know these lines!? They were edited yesterday.

DAMIEN

(anxious)

I don’t know, okay! Fuck! What would I get from stealing unfinished scripts?

Ian and the rest of the crew gasp dramatically at his words.

COURTNEY

You’re the first one to say it!

NOAH

(dramatic)

How could you?

SHAYNE

(betrayed)

I trusted you man!

OLIVIA

(scoffs)

And you call yourself a cat dad?

Damien turns to Olivia.

DAMIEN

Don’t you dare bring my cats into this!

IAN

Oh, we did, we brought them into this, Damien.

Damien turns towards Ian and as Noah starts speaking, Damien turns his head towards him.

NOAH

And you’ll never get to see them again.

Damien turns his head towards Shayne however, the latter is pointing a gun at his head. Damien’s jaw drops.

SHAYNE

Look in front of you.

OLIVIA

Stand up!

Damien does as told, confused.

SHAYNE

Put your hands behind your head!

DAMIEN

What the fuck is going on?

IAN

(ticks)

Do not say a word!

Damien gapes like a fish in front of his friends.

IAN (CONT'D)

Walk to the line on the floor over there.

Damien side eyes the line. He goes and faces them all.

OLIVIA

Now, answer these questions truthfully.

KEITH

Did you steal the scripts?

NOAH

Admit it!

SHAYNE

Don’t make me shoot you man!

Damien eyes the door, then back to the people in front of him and makes a run for it.

IAN

(to his suit)

Amanda. Lock the doors. Over.

(to the crew)

Get him!

**INT. OFFICE (CORRIDOR) - DAY**

Damien darts through the corridor to the sound of rock music _( specifically the intro from __Rock You Like a Hurricane by Scorpions_ _)_. He looks back a few times. He hears footsteps coming his way fairly fast. He reaches the end of the corridor and immediately turns left. He reaches a staircase.

**INT. OFFICE (SOMEWHERE) - DAY**

Damien looks out of breath. However, the footsteps echoing behind him keeps him running.

**INT. OFFICE’S LOBBY - DAY**

Damien reaches the office’s lobby almost limping. His hand stretches out to push the door to the outside world. It’s locked. Damien closes his eyes and silently accepts his fate.

DAMIEN

Well…

Damien hears steps behind him coming closer. He doesn’t dare look back. The footsteps come to a halt.

COURTNEY

Turn around.

(quietly)

We got him. Lobby. Over.

His eyes widen dramatically. Damien turns around slowly. Courtney and Shayne are in front of him, gun in hand, aimed directly at him.

COURTNEY (CONT

On your knees, bucco!

DAMIEN

This has to be a joke!

SHAYNE

ON YOUR DAMN KNEES MAN!

Damien drops to his knees and let a little cry out.

DAMIEN

(whispers)

Nani?

Footsteps becoming louder and louder could be heard. A particular loud sound resonates throughout the building.

**HARD CUT TO**

**INT. SOMEWHERE DARK - DAY**

Damien is sitting on a chair in the middle of a poorly lit room. Suddenly, a spotlight shines directly on him. Damien squints at the hash light and lowers his head. His hands are tied to the back of the chair and he starts to struggle as best as he can. Damien is sweating. Why is it so hot?

DAMIEN

(pause)

Oh right, because I have a hotspot pointing directly at me. My bad.

Damien chuckles at his line. Suddenly, a voice (Ian’s voice) comes out of nowhere.

IAN

Haas!

Damien looks around, trying to find where Ian is.

IAN (CONT’D)

It is time to concede, Haas.

DAMIEN

(pause)

Right, I have a power that, basically, allows me to know any script by heart without reading it. And, I can squeeze a whole watermelon with my thighs.

IAN

What?

DAMIEN

Also, I don’t actually need glasses. I just wear them in order to appear weaker in front of the simple human. This way I can attack and assert dominance over my ennemies… and I’m timeless too.

IAN

Not you’re not.

DAMIEN

(raises his eyebrows knowingly)

You don’t know that.

IAN

(whispers)

He’s right, we don’t know that.

KEITH

(whisper)

What do we do?

Meanwhile, Damien mumbles a song to himself. Some time pass by before Ian speaks again.

IAN

(In that cartoon villain style)

Fine! You won this time, Haas. But fear for I..

DAMIEN

Sweet! I was getting bored with this one. Au revoir, losers!

Damien leaves the parameter with his hand waving ‘’bye’’ as if he was never tried up to a chair in the first place.

TO BE CONTINUED

OR IS IT? 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know man, I tried something because I'm bored in my house sooo, I expect nothing. But if, by chance, one person reads it...
> 
> Hi!


End file.
